Every schoolyard had a bully. They were just part of the landscape. They were the older boy who was much larger than the other boys. He gathered a few “admirers" around him and sought out the less mature or smaller boys. They would steal their lunch money or terrorize them just because they could. Or it could be a small clutch of “Mean Girls” who would play cruel games on younger, less connected girls just because they could. The key to “bullyhood” is that they are cruel and threatening just because they could. They likely have deeper issues, but they select their victims just because they are smaller or have less support from other kids. Schoolyard bullies were a fact of life in the schoolyard. Unfortunately, they have become a fact of life in our political playground of 2020. Uncommon decency requires that we not tolerate bullying.
It
is often believed that bullying is a one-on-one activity between the bully and
their victim. But true bullying always
involves a crowd. The bully will gather
a cohort to cheer them on. We may
call this a gang or a group of mean girls.
These admirers will cheer the bully on while adding their own torment to the
victim’s distress. But there are others surrounding the bully. This is a group of spectators who show up to watch the bully and company at
work. The admirers and spectators play
essential roles in the bullying event. The former takes pride in their “leader” who picks on the different folks and establishes a norm of being just like us. Ther latter stand by and pretend that it is
none of their business while getting a thrill at seeing the weaker, different child being beaten up emotionally and physically. There is little we can do about the bully. The key to not tolerating bullying is to
“call out” the admirers and spectators.
Without them, the bully will back down and slick away in shame.
In 2020, we need an uncommon decency that will not tolerate
bullies. First, we need to look out for
the bullied. The bullied should not be on
their own. Second, we need to be honest
enough to not use a bully to intimidate our opponents in order to get our way and defend our views of normal. Ultimately, we need to gather around the
weaker and those less able to defend themselves and hold the bully’s admirers
and spectators responsible for their role.
We cannot rely on the “teacher” or other authorities to “fix” the
bullying. We need to look out for one
another, speaking up and, if necessary, surrounding the bullied with our
protective presence. In short, we, as a
community, need to stand up for the bullied while calling out the cowardice of
the bully and their admirers and spectators.
The most effective way to deal with today’s bully is to
vote. Name the bully and their admirers
and vote against them. Call out the
spectators that are cheering the bully on and help them see their role in the
abuse of the victims by voting against them as well. Uncommon decency demands no less.
We can also refuse to do business with the buly's allies who cheer him on from the sidelines. I am not talking simply about a boycott. We should make sure that their customers are informed of the businesses' support for the indecency of bullying. Such is the way of an uncommon deacency in 2020.
Uncommon decency does not tolerate bullying in the
schoolyard or the public square. Decent
people stand up for those who are suffering.
We do not stand aside and laugh at their misfortune. Nor does it tolerate bullying, even when it
supports our biases and prejudices. In the next 5 ½ weeks, call out the admirers
and spectators who are supporting the Bully in the White House and let them
know that you stand for an uncommon decency in the midst of the great indecency
of 2020.
Bob
No comments:
Post a Comment